Prayer Service for a Name Change
For the Courage to Name What Must Be Named
Introductory Rites
In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.
R: Amen.
My dear siblings, let us praise the Lord, who promised to give to “everyone who conquers…a white stone, and on the white stone is written a new name that no one knows except the one who receives it” (Revelation 2:17 NRSVUE).
Praise be to God, now and forever.
R: Amen.
Our God places a great importance on naming and names: God chooses to identify himself with the names of his people, consents to be named by his people, and gives his people names that express their dignity, identity, and purpose. In this celebration we shall join our sibling in expressing reliance upon God for a renewed sense of their dignity and identity in the changing of their name, in asking that God strengthen and encourage them to fulfill the purposes for which he has made them, and in affirming our commitment to each other as fellow members of the body of Christ.
Please be seated.
Reading of the Word of God
My dear siblings, listen to the words of the book of Genesis (32:24-31):
After he got them and brought them across the wadi and brought over what belonged to him, Jacob was left there alone. Then a man wrestled with him until the break of dawn. When the man saw that he could not prevail over him, he struck Jacob’s hip at its socket, so that Jacob’s socket was dislocated as he wrestled with him. The man then said, “Let me go, for it is daybreak.” But Jacob said, “I will not let you go until you bless me.” “What is your name?” the man asked. He answered, “Jacob.”
Then the man said, “You shall no longer be named Jacob, but Israel, because you have contended with divine and human beings and have prevailed.” Jacob then asked him, “Please tell me your name.” He answered, “Why do you ask for my name?” With that, he blessed him. Jacob named the place Peniel, “because I have seen God face to face,” he said, “yet my life has been spared.”
Psalm 139:1-6, 13-16 (NABRE)
R: I praise you, because I am wonderfully made.
Lord, you have probed me, you know me:
you know when I sit and stand;
you understand my thoughts from afar.
You sift through my travels and my rest;
with all my ways you are familiar.Even before a word is on my tongue,
Lord, you know it all.
Behind and before you encircle me
and rest your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
far too lofty for me to reach.You formed my inmost being;
you knit me in my mother’s womb.
I praise you, because I am wonderfully made;
wonderful are your works!
My very self you know.My bones are not hidden from you,
When I was being made in secret,
fashioned in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw me unformed;
in your book all are written down;
my days were shaped, before one came to be.R: I praise you, because I am wonderfully made.
Sermon
It is a bit strange, if you think about it: there are a handful of sounds produced by the human mouth and corresponding marks on a piece of paper that, when strung together, are meant to refer to each of us. They are given to us—by parents, by friends, by ourselves—as a calling card, to be used to get our attention when we are across the room, to make sure no one accidentally eats our lunch in the communal refrigerator at work. These sounds and marks—this name—does not initially seem very connected to who we are deep down, but over time and with enough repetition, it can begin to fit. The name becomes us, we become our name. This name can never actually encapsulate our entire identity, of course. But a name can become an expression of us, a shorthand for our very self, fearfully and wonderfully made by God.
But sometimes a name does not fit so neatly. Sometimes, after a significant life event or an evolution in self-understanding, we can start to feel that those sounds and marks have ceased to refer to us, that we have discovered something in our inmost being— something hitherto unexpressed—that needs to be recognized, that needs to be named. The name that came before may have been perfectly good, but it no longer feels right—or maybe the original name never really fit at all. It is in these moments that we might seek a new set of sounds and marks to express ourselves.
All this explains why names play such a significant role in the biblical text, and why there are so many examples of name changes. When God promises Abram a multitude of descendants, he changes his name to Abraham, meaning “father of many.” After successfully interpreting the dreams of the Pharaoh in Egypt, Joseph is given an Egyptian wife, an Egyptian leadership role, and an Egyptian name: Zaphenath-Paaneah. Returning home to Bethlehem after the death of her husband and sons, Ruth’s mother Naomi (which means “pleasant”) demands that she be known as Mara (which means “bitter”) as an expression of her mourning. And Jesus gives his disciple Simon the name Peter (related to the word for “rock”) because his confession is the rock upon which the Church was to be built. All these original names were perfectly good, but something else needed to be named.
In the passage we just read, Jacob spends all night wrestling with an unknown man he later recognizes is God himself. While they are still locked in combat, Jacob demands a blessing from the unknown man. The man responds by asking for Jacob’s name, and then changing it on the spot: “You shall no longer be named Jacob, but Israel [which means something like “contends with God”], because you have contended with divine and human beings and have prevailed.” Wrestling with God changes Jacob, and so he is rewarded by being given the honor of a new name, Israel—the name of the people who would descend from him. The name “Jacob” no longer fit; Jacob became Israel.
My dear siblings, a change like this has happened in the lives of one of our own. The name by which they have been known in this community does not fit, and they wish to be known by a new name, one that better expresses who they are. God is certainly not surprised by this, because he knows each of us even better than we know themselves. As the community to which they belong, we are called to accompany them, assuring them of our love and commitment, recognizing that in seeking to change their name they are expressing their commitment to being known. In return, they might teach us to look within ourselves, wrestle with God, and struggle for his blessing.
The French Catholic poet Patrice de La Tour du Pin beautifully expressed the process of self-discovery that might lead to a change of name when he wrote, “Do not crush what confidently whispers [God's] name inside you, / for he, himself, is planted among your elements. / It's a growing seed that needs his light / to become an answer in the blood."1 Let us pray to the Lord our God, that we would recognize that he, himself, is planted like a seed among our elements, that we would humbly receive his light, and that he would give us the courage to name all within us that needs to be named.
Name Change
Please rise.
Will the one who is seeking a change in name come forward?
In asking to be known by a different name among this community, you are expressing a renewed sense of your dignity and identity given to you by God, requesting for God to strengthen and encourage you in the purpose for which he has made you, and reaffirming your commitment to your fellow members of the body of Christ. We as your community assure you of our love and commitment as we ask: by what name do you wish to be known?
R: I wish to be known as N.
From now on, you will be known as N.
Giving of a White Stone
In the Apocalypse of John, Jesus Christ assures the churches that “to everyone who conquers…I will give a white stone, and on the white stone is written a new name that no one knows except the one who receives it” (Revelation 2:17 NRSVUE). Take, then, this white stone; may it always be a sign to you of the name to be given to you in victory, the name that is deeper and truer than any other name, the name no one knows but you alone.
R: Thanks be to God.
Members of this community, do you pledge your love and commitment to N., to pray that God strengthen and encourage them to fulfill the purposes for which he has made them, and to reaffirm your commitment as members of the body of Christ by using the name by which they wish to be known?
R: We do.
N., you may now take your place once again among the community.
Prayers of the Faithful
Let us pray.
Almighty God, you are the God who truly sees us (Genesis 16:13); you are the Father through whom every family on earth is named (Ephesians 3:14). Give us your people a greater appreciation of all the names by which we have been known, and all the names by which you are known to us.
R: Glorify your name in us, O God.
You sent your Son into the world to become incarnate, and he took upon himself a common Hebrew name that means “God saves.” Give to us a deeper sense of our dignity, identity, and purpose which we receive as gifts from you, which have been communicated to us in part through our names.
R: Glorify your name in us, O God.
You sent your Holy Spirit to us to be our Comforter, who intercedes for us with inexpressible groans when we have no words (Romans 8:26). Remind us that words and names can only express so much, and ground us in an intimate relationship with you that is beyond words and names.
R: Glorify your name in us, O God.
For your servant N., we ask that you bestow upon them the grace of a deeper awareness of their dignity, identity, and purpose as they seek to follow you and be more fully known in this community by their new name.
R: Glorify your name in us, O God.
Our Father
And now let us pray together the words our Savior taught us to pray:
Our Father who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come,
thy will be done
on earth as in heaven.
Give us today our daily bread;
and forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.
For thine is the kingdom,
and the power,
and the glory forever.
Amen.
Sign of Peace
The peace of the Lord be with you always.
R: And with your spirit.
In the name of Christ, now let us offer each other the sign of peace.
Concluding Rites
My dear siblings, let us pray.
O God, you who go by many names, you who consent to be named by us, you who know our names, and who know our very selves intimately, continue to give us courage as we seek to name all within us that must be named.
May the Lord bless us, protect us from all evil, and lead us to everlasting life.
R: Amen.
Let us go in peace to love and serve the Lord.
R: Thanks be to God.
Patrice de La Tour du Pin, “Psalm 29,” trans. Jennifer Grotz, Psalms of All My Days (Pittsburgh, PA: Carnegie Mellon University Press, 2013)